Відео

Do you know how unintentionally funny you are lol “then he robbed me”😂

How to get married as a woman 1. Go outside 2. Spot a guy you like 3. Pay him a compliment that clearly indicates your interest in him 4. Let him do the rest 5. Do this 2 times a day, for a week, and in a year you will have a husband or be on your way to having one It really is THAT simple for you all. Your expectations are insanely unrealistic though.

you are so funny. i know i keep saying that and i swear im not a bot but i love videos liek these where you're just talking about your opinion and giving your two cents

It also means you are the friend that takes care of everyone and you are usee by your friends. You look old and the choices are alwaya made by your friends on where to go and what to do. Get bettee friends

Response to the footnote in 24:00 And I believe in God, but I think sometimes it's not about God giving us our desires, but living in a society where we all have free will....yes, God is sovereign but even in His sovereignty things like colorism, featurism, anti-blackness CAN and WILL affect dating and marital outcomes because we all know that " LOVE" is political.

It's not that men merely tend to believe women have more options in dating and mating; they do, based on data, research, and observation. Pointing out that a significant percentage of women are failing in an area where they have considerable influence isn't a slight but a fact worth contemplating.

Yall are disgusting just cause you dont experience something doesnt mean you get to tell someone how to feel grow up🤨

I wouldn’t have gone another further until I got my back pay. Whether you belong or not don’t have a damn thing to do with what they owe you.

Someone who has really shifted my perspective is Law Roach when he spoke about his belief that romance is not meant for him. Now I am agonized by my lack of romantic love, but when I look at what I TRULY prioritize is my path and dreams, because the truth is it is easy to settle for just anyone. And I refuse to do that. Yes I may have high standards but I refuse to live a life that I am unsatisfied with. That is my cross to bare but I have struggled with major depression for a long time and now that I do feel I am in a better place I won’t put myself into despair with making choices based on what I’m “supposed” to.

beautiful video

I find a lot of these issues you bring up surround the importance of and the apparent virtue of external validation. As great as it can be, it is also hardly a good metric to determine if you are in fact- flourishing.

I’d like to raise my hand for a moment on this issue…as the less confident friend that felt “ugly” most of my life and therefore put little to no effort into my appearance which made me feel worse and didn’t get me any attention either…sometimes, it’s your friends. I’ve seen women say “I want to be the prettiest in the room” with my own two eyes and heard with my ears in real life, and they make it their mission no matter what. That yearning for attention is based in the same exact feeling the other lady (tiktoker) is feeling, and it is INADEQUACY. I worked through it in therapy and I have come to terms with the fact that people have preferences and they will shamelessly approach the person who they like even if they’re rude to another person. It’s disgusting but there’s nothing we can do. I would say that your friend should tear them a new one for entering y’all’s space and not greeting everyone, let alone ASKING to take some of the attention of the friend, but guys aren’t polite anymore and these women out here are highly competitive and attention whores, so they’d never do it anymore. The best thing you can do is do less partying and invest your time and efforts into your actual hobbies, where guys can find you in your happy place and elevate that happiness through your hobby. Clubbing and social drinking is popular, but spending time doing the things you’re truly passionate about (sometimes with a drink) will give you exposure to the guys who enjoy women with real hobbies.

I’ve prayed and “manifested” about meeting my person since I was a teen. I’m 31 now and have never had a real relationship and I just don’t think I’m going to. I’m so glad you touched on this! No one wants to say it out loud.

I LOVED watching this and seeing you enjoy your very special birthday! It brought me so much joy and I hope you continue to vlog :)

Im glad you made this video, it was very insightful and I especially appreciate the logical, realistic approach you give. I also did not choose to be childless so I understand the pain. thank you for the recommendation on the video I didnt choose to be childlfree, Im going over to watch it now that Ive finished your video.

5:58 so a woman can’t say no to a man’s advances? she HAS to go on a date with a man or sleep with a man just because the man wants to? men have all of this power?

Dating for women isn't hard. They make it hard by all chasing the same top 10 to 20 percent of dudes. And ignoring the ones that would actually treat them well. Sorry, I'm not sorry, but this is the world we live in.

I truly think it’s kind of like a defense mechanism too.. if they acknowledge there’s not always a happy ending then they have to acknowledge that they may not get their own, as well

Great video beautiful! Definitely needed to hear this.

What was hard for me after my divorce was trying to find a man who didnt want just a hookup and didnt want an instant relationship. I wanted someone who would take the time to get to know me. I found him AFTER uninstalling all my dating apps and going out to karaoke. We got married last year, Oct. 1.

11:30 min… No that’s not it. It’s his ongoing belittling tone and direct statements that ooze disrespect and a lack of being fully into her STILL. Their dynamic still gives…it’s all about him…and she’s an object who is useful to his goals, brand, image, and carrier of his seeds. But…to each his or her own. We all have to live, learn and evolve…if we choose…or not.

So dating is hard, but you managed to get pregnant somehow this makes no sense. This is modern woman double speak.

You always provide interesting commentary. As someone in a similar situation, I noticed my dating life changed for the better when I focused on the controllables. If I go out the objective isn’t to meet a hot guy I have chemistry with. It’s to go out and have a good time and genuinely enjoy meeting and engaging with people. I’m not selecting engagement with others based on asking myself “could he be my husband”. I can’t control that, but I can control if I have a good time. It’s not always easy, I’m an introvert, but this shift I think is critical for most women.

I needed this conversation today. I haven’t reached the phase of making a solid decision in either direction, but turning 44 this year, divorced and no children, I’m feeling the ache and desire to become a mom even more. Someone else on here said something that resonates with me. I find myself in a very strict environment that would frown on my decision to become a single mom so what do I do?? 😢

I just stumbled upon this video, and I'm glad I did. I appreciate this entire video, but the end in particular resonated with me. I'm now 37 years old, but I've been rejected by every woman I've ever approached. I had a lot of childhood trauma I had to work through in my early adult years, but I've spent little time pursuing romance. I'm in a much better headspace these days, but the lack of experience is easy to spot, and a huge turn off. In recent years, I've been approached by a few women, but they were either already in relationships, or wanted money or favors from me, and didn't like me for who I am. I frequent a lot of forums and subreddits like ForeverAlone because there's a lot of shared experiences there. My dissent from there is the constant red pill, woman hating rhetoric that's constantly being spouted in these spaces. And like you said, there's your fair share of useless advice there like "just go to the gym bro" "just be more confident bro" "just practice asking out ugly girls, then you'll be ready when you cross paths with a girl you actually want." Men and women are struggling in different ways, but sometimes it feels like there's no space for people like me that understand the nuance. Sorry for long comment.

It took me such a long time to accept that I might not receive the deepest desires of my heart, no matter how hard I prayed, fasted, read my Bible, believed and had the “faith of a mustard seed”. I’ve finally gotten to a place that I’m ok either way.

YESSS Stef,this is some of your best content 👌. Loving it from Trinidad 🇹🇹

You bw better get therapy

Hit the gym stop taking l's

Lol Immediately greeted with some kind of wig and tons of makeup and of course .....rambling....

Pretty privilege is a double edge sword. You attract more people but people often make an effort to hide their ugly side on the front end. But eventually it comes out and my then you are invested. In short I think pretty people have what appears like more options, but they also have to do a lot more vetting and I think the up kissing a lot more frogs and probably go through more heartbreak. I think less "beautiful" people get spared a lot of that and when someone likes them it's for real reasons and not superficial and short lived.

You're an incredible woman. For what it's worth I think you've been already been a mother to many by sharing your story and strength and helping many of us grow through our own challenges. I don't know what the future has in store for any of us. But I do think God places certain desires on our hearts for a reason that sometimes can look different than what we thought. Just remember there's more than one way to become a mother. Whether that be through nurturing a dream, our communities, and even a child through adoption. There are many paths to being a mother.

12:46 this ENRAGES ME!!! i had something similar last weekend, i was out dancing with my friend and two very pretty girls, this guy is dancing with us and he pushes me out the way to dance with one of the girls... I literally was like fuck that and went to the bathroom😭 something like this can just severely ruin your night

I love watching your videos relating to dating/relationships! I feel like I have someone who understands and knows how hard it is, especially when we know who/what we are looking for. Its stressful especially when receiving pressure and questions from our surroundings - along with their "advice." Sigh, its alot. I do feel timing does make a difference, however it is tough. Thanks for being vulnerable and sharing.

if only it is equally easy to make friends as adults like making friends as a kid

Look there is a point we're you need to look critically at the common denominator in dating failures and it it most likely going to be you choices or behaviors. Where are you looking, are you acting desperate, do you love yourself, what criteria are you using to select, location is a big deal, are you capable of being genuinely friends with the sex you are interested in (if not you are to mentally immature to date anyone)? There are so many factors that once you get yourself right mentally, emotionally, and socially that dating success is basically a 2 way audition. Most actors get rejected 60+ times before they get selected for their first role. Since 2 people have to simultaniously select eachother, then dating success has at a minimum a 1 in 120 chance of success even if you are both in the right place mentally, emotionally, and socially. But you have a 1 in 5 chance of getting an std. Marriages end in divorce about 83% of the time so if we use that as an analog for dating success..... nobody is going to have a higher dating success chance than 27% under mutually perfect conditions because you can't be more successful than the thing that is actually legally hard to get out of.

Listen some ladies need to stay in their lane. If you are not physically appealing to a guy why get upset; just move on with your life.

Agree with this. I am 28 - never been in a relationship, nor had any man ever been interested in pursuing one with me. Not that I am being "too selective." The interest just is not there (aside from hookups). When I was in my early 20s, I really put myself out there and got burnt when every man I met just wanted sex. Now, I am almost 30, and the attention still is not there, but I don't fall for the hookup guys. So, I'm in a situation where I am just riding solo (no interest, no dates, no hookups), but oddly, it feels more fulfilling bc now I am not getting used to sex, at least. I still think that I will meet my person... someday. However, I am done holding out for hope and will work on building a good life as a single person. TBH, the want for romantic love is still there, but the reality is what the reality is, too. I also agree that this conversation is hard with "normal" people who've dated and had relationships. They (women) truly do not understand and say empty statements like, "Oh, it'll happen when it happens." and "Don't force things. It'll happen when you're ready." Well, there are plenty of "not ready" people in relationships right now, and it still happens to them. The words are empty, but there is nothing else they can say because they don't relate to the situation. I have one friend in a 16-year relationship, broke up, was single for less than 5 months, and has been married for 2 years to a new person... yea... it's not an even playing field for everyone.

There's been times where I felt sad about not having success in relationships. But when I observe the relationships of the people around me, I'm reminded why I'm single. I'm finding it rare that couples have a healthy relationship. All I see is baby mama/ baby dad drama, cheating, abuse (financial and physical), and people being together for the esthetic/ validation of others.

When I hit 29 with no real relationships in the last 5-6 years, I accepted that maybe a traditional marriage and romance was not the path that my life was destined to take. It's frustrating because relationships are the one thing in life that you cannot control. It takes cooperation and harmony from another person. I'm focusing on becoming the person who I want to be (spiritually, physically, financially) and controlling the things that I can control.

I am 24 and have recently met the man that I believe will be my future husband. I am fairly young, but believe me, it felt like an eternity, so im feeling for you all. Once he came along everything was so easy, straightforward and natural. Also, i have found something else to be sad or worried about, of couse i have hahaha thats why hapiness comes from God and God only.

Im 40, i partied harder in my younger dayz, im just that friend that never got appproached, ive come to the conclusion that males are shallow asf. I mentioned to my bestie one night, what is wrong with me? Guys never approach me, yet i get from people i know, your beautiful...ugh. stop lyin to me already

Thank you for sharing your experience and encouragement!

Maybe its just me but I was always under the impression that finding the one was very difficult? It is hard, finding a lifelong partner as an adult is a hard process. Some people get lucky and some don’t, life can just suck even if you’re doing everything right.

My heart goes out to you and other women that deal with this disappointment.

Let me preface this with saying, the quality of dating options have declined in my opinion. That being said, in my experience, dating successfully is a combination of appearance (natural or enhanced), adopting traits that attract the partners you want, and being realistic about who to develop affection for, and what is most important to you.

I agree about manifestations, this is annoying, how one feels comes from inside and outside.

People like to rewrite the narrative when they find success. I was woe is me until i found my bf at 31. I just never gave up, thats all i can say

Depth over looks, period. However a balance between the two is highly preferred.

What a beautiful testimony ❤